When He Became a Bigger Man She No Longer Wanted Him

One of his ex-girlfriends was attracted to him because of his limited experience in life that exhibited a particular character she adored. Sometimes feeling awful because you’re not on the same level as another adult that you idolize isn’t so bad. That horrible feeling and your limited experience in certain regards in life is why you have that wonderful girlfriend who loves you. You don’t have to be the man that you idolize. If you develop into a particular man on your way to becoming the man that you idolize, you’ll drop away key qualities about you that the girl you love, and who loves you, values; you can lose her.

He was her baby, and she admired him. Cuddles, cheek, and lip kisses that left him in a blush. Doing and saying whatever put a smile on his face. However, when he started to discover more qualities about himself, after realizing his potential, he began to become a bigger man in pursuit of development. She wasn’t too fond of this man because he was no longer the baby that she used to spoil.

He idolized the typical white business corporate man in a suit and tie, and so he pursued. She was not into this type of man. See, he was very smart and talented. He could’ve been anything he put his mind to. He viewed this idol as the best of the best. And so he went after what he thought was supreme without her true feelings considered. He thought only about himself and what he thought was best for him. Once he accomplished one aspect of this idol after another, he was sold that he could become him.

The Idiolize

He was a sweet, funny, loving, and inexperienced in life (nearly naive) type of guy who made about $30,000/yr in marketing. She on the other hand made about $50,000/yr in retail.

She was athletic, fun, smart, very ladylike, confident, and open-minded. She liked guys similar to Bob Marley. And he on the other hand was just looking for the one, no matter what type they were.

He liked her. She was sexy, daring, and intelligent. He couldn’t stay away. He even treated her daughter like his own. He considered starting a family with her.

He used to be the guy that she liked but he suddenly made changes to his personality and way of life. This change could’ve been because of experiences with her, having to adjust to her way of life, and then realizing more about himself, and what he likes and does not like as time progressed. Well, many may think.

They say your subconscious mind is always at work with developing you. What you see much of and are effectuated with gets recorded in the subconscious. And in addition, whatever you set your mind to, you’ll become. So, because his mind was set to becoming this white corporate guy, he began to evolve into such.

He began to use the white corporate guy’s lingo. He dressed like him. He began to think for himself versus allowing her to do it for him. His voice was loud, boisterous, and robust. He was in control of his destiny. She grew apart from him because she could no longer control him. She wasn’t attracted to a bigger man.

He once wore urban clothing but now he chooses dress clothing – ties, slacks, dress shirts, and suit jackets; pressed and creased. Throughout his change, she tolerated it but you can tell she wasn’t as interested as she was before. The crowd she hung around, her family, all weren’t accustomed to this type of man. Actually, they had a chip on their shoulder regarding such type. She couldn’t go on, even if she wanted to.

Who he was. Who she liked. Who she would rather love

He was a relaxed guy who was quiet and thoughtful; his idol was the older guys around his neighborhood at the time. The ones that had the ladies and who all the guys wanted to be. These idols had cars, were cool, looked awesome, and weren’t pushovers. Oh! And they had money in their pockets.

He had dreadlocks and dressed urban. He had a smile that drove the ladies wild, and his face was attractive in the sense of making a woman drool. He had all of the latest sneakers. He had a mean face around the fellas that let them know he meant business. She thought his mug was cute. She was hooked and enjoyed every kiss and every hug and any other intimate gesture he submitted.

She cried when he left. She longed for him in his absence. Her smile lit up when he arrived. She felt like he was her soul mate.

He didn’t call her on the phone all of the time, or put her first, but she liked this guy. He cursed, smoked cigarettes, and disregarded her at times. She still liked this guy. His clothes may not have been neat and in tip-top shape but she liked this guy. His hair may not have been combed all of the time to perfection, but she liked this guy. Sometimes he didn’t even shower. Guess what? She still liked him. All of these ways about him were like night and who he was becoming was like day or vice versa. Depending on who you ask.

He spoke with slang and used words only a certain race could use. Only his culture could fully understand him. To her, and to other girls of the likes, he was one of the cutest guys on earth. He was conceited because of flustering girls’ attention upon him and complimentary responses.

Why did he want to become a white man?

He served in the military and made some mistakes that cost him dearly. He had to pay a price and to whom? Society. Because society is supposedly run by the white man, he had to pay them in ideas, since he was smart and creative. To relate to them, he had to become them. He had to speak, think, and look like them.

However, he had no idea he was paying a debt. They just secretly put him among them and reprogrammed him. They’d let him go back when his debt is paid. Were they wrong? Probably not. He caused destruction in a section of society and some of the people he affected will remember what he did for a long time. Perhaps, they’ll only see him for the mistakes he made. But, with his new identity, they can have some comfort. as the white man’s face, speech, and actions are usually pleasant in society.

He developed a strong urge to become a white man. It was inevitable. He could not control his becoming.

Did he find another girlfriend that liked him for the new him?

Absolutely. He dated white girls, Spanish girls, and even other black girls who dated him along his ride to become the white corporate, suit-and-tie professional type of guy. Although he never found the perfect match for his sought identity, he had fun along the journey. The longest relationship lasted roughly two years, and she was not white.

Will she want him back after he returns to his normal self?

Because of the pain endured during recovery from the emotional disconnect after being attached, she won’t take a risk of that happening again. Besides, he did not seek to become a white corporate, professional type of guy earlier on in their relationship. But the experiences on the path to becoming this bigger man will be a part of him from that point forward. She will see that white corporate man within him every time she looks at him. Even if he does return, her memories will never allow her to see him any other way.

Although he was kinda forced into becoming this bigger man, one who isn’t forced can still learn a valuable lesson: it’s best to stay who you are and not want to become anyone else. Although your girlfriend may complain about your lack of, you can advance who you already are versus becoming a completely different person. An idol may be the world to you, but you may want to consider the one you like/love’s feelings when adopting their qualities. If you don’t want to lose her, don’t lose yourself.

He started to become a bigger man, one that became more professional. He was no longer the baby she once knew. He was unfamiliar. She had to move on because her like/love faded. He continued on his path to become the white professional and was satisfied. She eventually moved on and found peace, And so did he. She never found a guy as good as the guy before the guy who chased being his white idol.

Dating Again After Breaking Up With Somone Who Was Incompatible

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